Rock bottom… kind of

I am pretty sure that you don’t come here for updates on my weight :). Hell *I* don’t come here to update on my weight! But I have hit rock bottom. Or rather I have hit peak weight…. but either way I thought I had hit it before… and then evidently I realised that the bottom was made of delicious chocolate coated, deep fried deliciousness and I just kept eating…. which is kind of humiliating… kind of expected. Exercise and fitness is NOT something that comes naturally to me. I am the girl who skipped gym class by having my period every single week. Then when that stopped working I played off of having a bone deformity in my wrists (which is actually real) which unfortunately meant that anything requiring contact (hitting things) or twisting motions (throwing things) or fast movements (throwing things) or putting pressure on my wrists (pushups) was out. To be perfectly honest all of those things are true, but none of them affect my legs… or my ability to at least TRY and participate.

Since I left school I have had a very up and down relationship with my weight. After leaving Tinman for the first time I fell in love with walking the dog and we would walk for 5km every day, then I graduated to the gym, but then I took it too too far and ended up with all sorts of disordered patterns (working out for a couple of hours once or twice a day, 5 or 6 days per week while not really eating allot).

So once I got pregnant with Moody a couple of years later I just ate everything and I ballooned from about 50kg to over 80 and that is where I stayed until I decided after Mayhem was born that I needed to do SOMETHING, not necessarily fitness related but I felt like I was stagnating, like the world was passing me by. So I took up running. I set my sights on the Bridge Run, a 10km course that ran over the Sydney Harbour Bridge and I attacked it. I ran it in September of 2013 and between the training for that and breastfeeding I pretty much shed the weight like it was nothing (except slogging it around the neighbourhood for an hour at a time in the cold and the rain several times a week… you know … nothing). I ran the race in 2013 (so the year after he was born) and was so proud of myself. But then I stopped again.

I lost allot of weight after Tinman left me this time around. Which was 3 years ago. I have a MOUNTAIN of size 12 clothes in my wardrobe that I can’t wear because unfortunately the heartbreak diet has a limited effectiveness span and I ran out the clock without really thinking about doing what I needed to do to stay where I was.

So here I am again, and wondering what the hell happened. So this is kind of me coming out, acknowledging that something needs to change. Not just because I want back into those size 12 clothes but also because I want to feel good again, instead of waking up sore, and spending days hobbling around, having sore knees and hips and shoulders…. so back to Fitness Fridays it will be.

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Starting to think I have bitten off more than I can chew….

This week is orientation week at uni. The week when traditionally the unit plans and schedules are rolled out to the trembling mass of students who are either chomping at the bit to get started or curled in a ball rocking under the chair… I am somewhere in between.

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Goals progress

So in July of 2015 I set myself some goals for the upcoming 12 months.

  • HD or D results for all subjects in both upcoming semesters
    • Spent at least an hour studying each day, focus on study while kids are at daycare/school for the 2 days a week they are there.
  • Start playing with the guitar I’ve had it for about 7 years, time to dust it off and figure it out!
    • Explore garage band on my Mac and see if I can learn the basics from that.
  • Complete 3 ice-skating courses each one is 8 weeks long
    • I am booked in to start TOMORROW!! So excited.
  • Finish restoring bedroom suite and start on dining table
    • This is going to have to wait until summer break from uni
  • Be a more attentive mother.
    • I am banning mobile devices from the dining table
    • One planned outing each weekend
    • attempt to get one on one time with each of them during the week.

I figure no point in setting goals if you don’t follow up on them.

So so far I have followed through on the first one. I got a Distinction in my last semester and am fully prepped to do even better this coming semester.

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I still haven’t picked up that darned guitar and with the extra study load I have picked up this year I am really not confident about the amount of time required to get a good base in it at all… so I think I might have to let that one slide.

I have completed the first Ice-skating course. But according to the teacher our class completed the 2 basic classes and got most of the way through the third before our time was done. I confess to piking out once they started expecting us to go backwards… there is something about not being able to see where I was going that freaked me out. So I call this one complete :).

I haven’t started on the restoration yet. But today is fine and cool enough that I am pretty sure that I can get through quite a bit of the stripping required…. so today may just be the day.

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As for being more attentive… I have my good days and I have my bad days. I am certainly getting much better at not having devices at the table which is a great start. As for the outings each weekend I slacked off that over the summer holidays. It is something that I really need to focus on getting back to because it is something that we all enjoy and it helps to keep the kids sane. That is my main focus for the next few months. The one on one time hasn’t really been happening, that is probably where I feel like I am really falling down.

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Overall considering that the last few months have been challenging emotionally and time wise I am fairly happy with my progress…

So right now I am going to go and strip the last of that ugly paint off my bedside tables. Have a great one.

 

Goals for my 33rd year

So today is the day. As with most single mums it has been pretty low key. I forced a sleep in from the kids, got up got them breakfast and then told them I was going back to bed! Which has bought me 2 hours of resting if not sleeping. But I am happy with that. For my birthday this year when people have asked I have asked for vouchers to a local sports store so that I can buy myself some free weights. A gym membership really doesn’t fit into my budget right now so I need to get myself set up so that it becomes unnecessary.

But the biggest thing on my radar at the moment aside from the obvious getting older has been making sure that the next few years are productive. One of the biggest things that I have realised over the last few weeks is that for the last few years I have been floating, not really expending as much effort as I need to. Don’t get me wrong there have been things that I have worked for but there are also things that I have just let slide. That is no longer an option. So for my 33rd year what do I want to accomplish?

Goals

  • HD or D results for all subjects in both upcoming semesters
    • Spent at least an hour studying each day, focus on study while kids are at daycare/school for the 2 days a week they are there.
  • Start playing with the guitar I’ve had it for about 7 years, time to dust it off and figure it out!
    • Explore garage band on my Mac and see if I can learn the basics from that.
  • Complete 3 ice-skating courses each one is 8 weeks long
    • I am booked in to start TOMORROW!! So excited.
  • Finish restoring bedroom suite and start on dining table
    • This is going to have to wait until summer break from uni
  • Be a more attentive mother.
    • I am banning mobile devices from the dining table
    • One planned outing each weekend
    • attempt to get one on one time with each of them during the week.

There is nothing that is unachievable on that list. Am I the only one who sets goals on their birthday?